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the plastic bird was not enough. now a fine black mesh is wrapped around several pots and places on the balcony. some monster had arrived to put pig back with eons. there were bits and pieces of bits and pieces all over the floor. had a visitor tried to make me hate them? were the gifts of guano expressions of love?
i was not very good at reading the signs.
not sure the mesh will do anything. if it will not work, the next step is going to be the purchase of a bucket of toothpicks.

walking to mr. suds later in the afternoon, i noticed a pigeon that looked as if half of it were glued to the middle of the ocean parkway service road. the bird must have broken a wing and perhaps more and was now trying to take off, in heart breaking slow motion, maybe at a wave a second.
almost wanted another car to arrive and free it of pain right there. or was i supposed to break its neck?
was this somehow connected to how much i had hated pigeons just a few minutes prior?
i imagined that the best outcome of this would be one of the cats living around the building finding the pigeon, killing it gently and then feeding it to its young.

when i walked past the spot a few minutes later, that seemed exactly what i saw about to happen. a not very large female cat was carrying the freshly killed pigeon in its teeth. the cat had to walk almost upright because of her front legs being almost too short to carry the large bird without letting it touch the ground. the pigeon, with its iridescent belly facing forward, had its wings wide open, together the animals looked like a griffin, or some other yet to be described mythical animal.

looked down on my neighbours balcony. the mother pigeon was still sitting on the nest she had made in one of my neighbour's flower boxes. next to her was a small open eggshell. i at first thought that some other animal had taken the content of the egg and that the mother was sitting there traumatized. an odd thought but probably conditioned by my experience of seeing a pigeon killed just minutes prior. when i looked again and from a different angle, i could clearly see a yellowish, naked, freshly hatched thing under the mother's belly moving slowly.
it looked as if it were two little birds even. but i think it was just one.

then i noticed a second nest on my neighbours balcony, in a larger, round pot. what just a few days ago appeared to be a lucky accident now seemed to be a breeding ground for birds right under my nose. my feelings for pigeons was split back into pigs and eons.

quite a circle of emotions for a simple gray sunday, maybe as gray as the underwing of a pigeon in flight.

home matters...

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I was told that it would have taken me less time to do the dishes than to write about me not having done the dishes in a long time. Doing the dishes did take longer than writing about them. I finished the work around 3am last night. The place is transforming again. I have entered that forgotten room behind a door in my bedroom, the stem-room, the trailer, the office, the studio. I have not been here for quite a while now. The images had started falling off the wall, so I took them off, most of them, and packed them neatly into one of the many boxes piled at the other wall. A lot is going on here on one hand, nothing is going on here on the other hand. And this is not good, no matter how I look at it. Need to do the work. Need to do it now. If not now, when? Oh, and it was interesting to find a very good photograph that shows the place where I was born. This here is the city where I am from. A very nice picture taken by Wojciech Wilczyk. The picture looks exactly like my memories of my early childhood and later vacations spent with my grandparents and my uncle. Even though the picture here was shot in 2001.

Closing windows and sea urchins.

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My windows in the bedroom now close. This is really exciting news for me. Especially as the weather is getting chillier and chillier. The wind is getting ready for its finest hour in January... well, hours. And not only in January, of course. My Landlord (~Lady) is of the incredibly responsible kind. Things just get done. We communicate via email. It is quite great. The rooms here are still mainly filled with an echo. It will probably stay like this for a little while. Slowness is okay. I use a box as a chair. I use a folding table as a table. It is great. I will maybe hang up the picture of a sea urchin. It is one of my favorite drawings. Well, it is a print. A great one. At least as far as I remember. I might finally have a wall for it... hmm... okay, maybe this could be a great last thing for today.
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