5th Avenue Kid

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The was probably 55 or so, he had these expensive gold rim glasses on, a suit and a very tasteful tie. His white hair was professionally groomed to perfection. He was leaving the Disney store on 5th avenue with his elegantly dressed, four year old son on his arm. The son was dressed as expensively as the . I think he wore a tie as well, his hair, not white yet, was groomed with the same care as his dad's. The boy was screaming on top of his lungs. Neither one of them was carrying a disney bag, so I can only imagine what drama must have happened inside of the store that made the not buy one of the newest cute "Finding Nemo" toys for his child.
The boy must have been screaming inside for a while, because he now started kicking and grabbing for whatever he could reach. He finally managed to get hold of his 's glasses. He tore them of the man's face and squeezed them in his little hand with such vicious determination that they just gave up their original shape.
The slowed down his , who naturally tried to get his spectacles back, grasped for the boys wildly moving arm with the glasses, almost lost his balance... he had to let the boy stand on his own feet.
This seemed to be the moment the boy wanted to happen. He threw his 's glasses against the sidewalk with whatever hight was in him. The frame barely bounced, the glass did not break, the grabbed the little boy by the shoulders in a pathetic attempt to calm down this little monster. The little guy now finished off his attack by stepping with all his four year old might on the glasses. Again and again and again... still screaming, still on top of his lungs.
I entered the Disney store and was greeted by a very happy man who was wearing a shark as a giant, plush glove. The shark spoke to me:"Did you get the new 'Finding Nemo' toys yet? You get two FREE tickets with a purchase of $50 or more." And there I was, truly a witness to the many new meanings of several four letter "f" words...

7 Comments

f-i-s-h!

such a strange little boy :) my father would have just left me on the side walk and went home himself or he would have gone to afternoon tea and read a newspaper. Not that I've tried.

Every child does it and every parent deals with it differently. My aunt was a strong proponent of the strategically placed pinch. Back of the upper arm works exceptionally well. It hurts, but not in an abusive way, and it gets the child's attention the way a grab or a slap will not. And the pressure of the pinch can be increased if the child does not calm down.

Further, witnesses can see no sign of physical harm being perpetrated upon the child. Even at four, the child is aware that public sympathy is their strongest ally. The pinch is silent, but deadly effective.

Finally, no one should bring a four year old into the Disney Store to browse. That's just a big tease and little kids don't understand it. You enter the store, you have to buy something, even if it's a three dollar piece of crap. That's the nature of the beast.

Stacey, you are right. (How about remote controlled electro belts... they work like the pinch, but hey, way more effective... okay, bad joke, sorry.)
I was lucky enough to grow up in Poland where there were no Disney stores (at that time.)
I still wanted the toys that were available, of course.
What my parents did was interesting. My mom convinced me that I was really fascinated by those cheap, highly portable little plastic animals and those cheap, interesting animal postcards. Thus, we would always opt for those when in a toystore. Hey, I was increasing my collection, not just buying stuff AND I was learning something with each purchase.
My father just never had any money on him. None. No cards, nothing. He is a master of that. So I would always get these really cool postcards and plastic animals with mom and nothing with dad.
I felt like we were really, really poor. We probably were.
(Once lego came to town, which was 1977 or so, the gloves came off and my parents just went for it... but by then I was 7 and had a huge collection of plastic animals and rare postcards...)

Little boys are strange creatures. My cousin and I were having a great time together yesterday until he decided he no longer wanted me there, and started screaming...which was when the other little boy, who wouldn't talk to me at all for 2 days, decided to start liking me...weird. Hey, I would throw a tantrum too if I had to walk out of the Disney Store without anything...:(

that's why i have dawgs.

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This page contains a single entry by Witold published on May 28, 2003 12:14 AM.

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