Weaponized Fish.

| 2 Comments

One of my neighbors must have wrestled with a big fish on this humid May afternoon. The fish probably lost. And so the neighbor, to mark a clear victory just left the fish on the carpet. And the afternoon might have been yesterday, because today, today even aromatic candles can not fight the very special kind of smell in the hallway. It might, of course, be act seven in the mini war between some neighbors here. It is all about territory. Flags are posted on doors, other doors remain open, just to show off power. We recently got a knock on our door. “It is your crazy Austrian Neighbor knocking”, now really. We have no Austrian Neighbor here. This is what happens when Europe is perceived as this huge, unexplored suburb of Paris, which is technically a country. Why Austrian? The lady they might have meant is from Russia, I think. Oy, crazy kids starting some mischugge games. What’s wrong with these people. OK, so now there is fish stink. Let’s see what’s next.

2 Comments

the strangest/worst thing i have seen in terms of neighbor wars was in the last place i lived: the lady across the hall from me waving a kitchen knife meant for her cousin who was staying with her. both my neighbor and her cousin were held back by men. lots of shouting and cussing. kicking and thrashing. i called the cops and huddled as far away from my door until they came and broke them up. that was a couple years ago. to her credit, she didnt have any other outbreaks like that since. maybe her cousin scared the crap out of her.

and then theres the man who kept getting locked out by his wife. he drank and came home late and i guess she got fed up and refused to house him after a certain hour. lots of cussing and shouting. (it seemed to be a theme around there.)

i guess these werent so much neighbor wars as family feuds.

i havent had anyone drop fish in the hallway. and i dont know if i have any crazy austrian neighbors. come to think of it, i really dont know any austrians at all. except schwarzenegger. but he doesnt count because i dont know him personally. and is he crazy? maybe. but definitely rich. probably rich enough (by some accounts 300 M in the bank) that he can live so that he doesnt have to deal with any neighbors.

: )
the neighbor war seems to be a bit more quiet these days...
oh, and my neighbor is really not Austrian...
: )

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This page contains a single entry by Witold published on May 28, 2002 11:19 PM.

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